Servanthood in Marriage
Keeping the honeymoon stage alive may seem like quite a challenge. Many marriages start well but finish poorly. My desire is to finish strong, and my prayer is that at the end of my life, my love for my wife will be tremendously greater than when we first got married. This is impossible to accomplish on my own. The only way to build a lasting marriage while keeping the honeymoon stage alive is to love like Jesus does.
Philippians 2 outlines a perfect example of love from the actions of Jesus. Philippians 2:6-8 says, “Jesus has always been as God is. But He did not hold to His rights as God. He put aside everything that belonged to Him and made Himself the same as a servant who is owned by someone. He became human by being born as a man.” If God humbled Himself, became a servant, and laid down his life, we should be willing to do the same for our spouse.
I love the lyrics from Hillsong United that says, “I touch the sky when my knees hit the ground.” The song is about how in the kingdom of God, everything is turned upside down. Instead of reaching for the sky to become the greatest, the lowest servants are considered the greatest. Not only did Christ preach this, but He also displayed it.
Philippians 2:8-9 goes on to say, “After He became a man, He gave up His important place and obeyed by dying on a cross. Because of this, God lifted Jesus high above everything else. He gave Him a name that is greater than any other name.” After Jesus humbled Himself to the lowest position, God exalted Him to the highest.
At times, I have worried about if my needs were being met or if I was happy in marriage. However, if I am going to love my wife like Jesus loves me, I must completely put aside my needs, humble myself, and serve. When I serve out of a genuine love for my wife, everything else will fall into place.
Jesus displayed the ultimate agape love. Agape love is a selfless, sacrificial love that can only be given through Christ. Phileo love is based on feelings, but agape love is based on a choice. Every day, I have a choice. Am I going to put aside my wishes and serve my wife? Through the power of God, this choice is possible for every marriage. Finishing strong is made possible by the agape love that Christ showed us so that we would lay down our lives and show this love to each other.
The 5 Love Languages
Understanding each other’s love language can help keep the honeymoon stage alive. Take the free test to discover your love language at 5lovelanguages.com.
Till Death Do Us Part
The goal of every young marriage should be to become an old one. Click on the image below for the interactive version of this graphic.
Couple’s Stories & Advice
I had the honor of interviewing three couples. One was married for a year, another for 14 years, and another for 60 years. Watch the video below to hear their stories.